Coping...

Reality hits you hardest when death is involved... I hate facing it, but for the past two weeks I have to deal with it. When it happened, I couldn't believe it that it happen so soon... I thought there would be more time... I took everything for granted...



And now it's two weeks since the death occurred. It still hurts when I think about it especially when I'm writing this. At first I was blaming myself for it... I could've done something... It was just time though. It can't be helped when it's time. I thank my family and friends for realizing this part. I still wish I could do something, but I know that it's done and there's nothing else I can do but remember the good times.

Right now I'm only coping and trying to get a sense of normalcy back in my life, but still difficult even though it felt like there wasn't much before death happened... It was routine and now that routine is disrupted and completely changed forever.

I kept this quiet to a lot of people. Only a few of my friends knew about it and I told about it. And I thank those people, you know who you are, who have helped me in this time of grief.

One friend inadvertently cheered me up though he didn't know my situation. He just linked me a video and that was somewhat cheering me up. This is that video:

Apparently there's a lot of these video which is called 腰ふりダンス but looking up "MMD Libera Me" also lets you find more of these videos. It occupied my mind.

But it wasn't until I was browsing Danbooru that I encountered some Ao Usagi's art that made me felt better and I was laughing again.

One of the tags on Pixiv said it's a "flat chest". I laughed hard! It was one of the most hilarious thing I heard. Then I looked up some more and found lots more interesting images. It was a step forward to getting my life back.

It was a week ago that I felt there were closure to this death business. And I mean business! You spend LOTS of money when someone dies! I'm kinda sickened by it, but I was also pleasantly surprised to see the generosity of other people. Very kind people.

I know this is one of the strangest post... It was sad but I've put in a lot of ecchi things as well. It can't be helped because there are just a lot of emotions in life and you gotta keep on living. And I guess my way of living is through this ^^; This was pretty much how I felt in the last two weeks.

Anyway there were a few more Ao Usagi's art that I found that day and I was just laughing my head off despite the situation ^^;

1/7 Reimu figure is the title of this picture... Basically only a fraction of Reimu instead of the 1/7 scale ^^; There was a different one that is NSFW, but it was also hilarious!

Here's another video that cracked me up. I couldn't help but smile and I also went and look for other versions of this video ;)

Bunch of lolicons! XD

And another video that to this day I've kept watching over and over, especially after finding the first video I posted with the cute MikuMikuDance character called Rhea.

Very cute! I wonder what's going on at the end of it.

So now I've been trying to reconfigure my life after this event... I'll continue what I usually do, but maybe not as much. I've been slowing down as it is. Busy life has become busier... Thank you again to everyone who've helped me and for the kind words. I hope to repay your kindness in some way one day.

Lastly, I leave you with a picture of Kyuubey... I intend to use this picture for a profile picture somewhere someday and then show people the whole picture :P

Click me to see the full picture!